When Ariel, an intern at Nordstrom over a decade ago, wrapped up her season, I asked her the same question I always ask interns: “What was the #1 thing you learned from your experience?”
Her response left me stunned, then doubled over in laughter:
“I learned how to say F you with only a smile.”
It was fair. It was valid. And it was the lesson I didn’t realize I had been teaching her all along.
The world of consulting—especially as a woman building a premium brand—requires this unique blend of grit and grace. It’s not about being confrontational; it’s about standing firm in your values while presenting yourself in a way that commands respect and attracts the right kind of clients.
This concept of balancing boldness with refinement is key to building an extraordinary brand message—one that shatters glass ceilings and allows you to step into uncommon wealth. Let’s talk about how to apply it when your confidence is tested.
Why Confidence is a Cornerstone of Your Brand
Your brand message isn’t just about words on a website or social post; it’s about the energy you bring into every interaction. As a woman in consulting, your confidence becomes the foundation for how others perceive your brand’s value. And trust me, confidence will be tested.
Case in point: not long ago, I received a less-than-friendly response to a simple outreach message.
The DM That Didn’t Sparkle
I was sitting at my desk, working through my day, when a reply popped into my inbox:
“Hey Réland, I’m actually a messaging and communication expert, and I don’t appreciate the pitch slap. If this is how you communicate in the first message, I can tell our styles aren’t compatible. Have a great day.”
Here’s the kicker—I wasn’t pitching. My outreach strategy is rooted in generosity. My assistant researches each contact carefully to ensure alignment before we even send a message. When we do, it’s a soft introduction to a resource: a free, fun brand messaging quiz designed to help others fine-tune their messaging through archetypes. No hard sell. No $20k service offer.
I could’ve ignored the message or let it ruin my day. Instead, I saw it for what it was: an opportunity to embody the confidence and kindness that defines my brand.
How to Respond with Grace (Even When You Don’t Want To)
Here’s the response I sent:
“It was not my intention to trigger you. However, asking if you’d like to take a quiz is not a pitch slap. If I was pitching, I would’ve told you about my $20k services. I didn’t do that.
One of my good friends, also a brand expert, recently posted about how even brand experts need the help of others in the field. It motivated me to continue offering help.
We’re all trying to grow our businesses here, and I’ve learned that successful people don’t put others down. I hope you find space for more kindness in the future. Have a great holiday season.”
Why share this story? Because it illustrates a core truth about building an extraordinary brand message: how you handle challenges speaks volumes about the kind of business you run.
3 Lessons for Women Consultants Navigating High-Stakes Challenges
- Your Brand is Your Backbone The way you handle adversity must align with your brand values. For me, my brand is about creating spaces of empowerment and refinement. That means I respond to negativity with composure, not aggression. For you, it might mean leaning into whatever values set your brand apart: honesty, exclusivity, warmth.
- Generosity is Not Weakness Offering something of value without strings attached shows confidence in your expertise. My quiz wasn’t about a hard sell; it was about creating awareness and sparking genuine relationships. This approach doesn’t just attract clients—it attracts the right clients who value generosity and sophistication.
- Grace Leaves a Lasting Impression In moments of tension, how you react can either elevate or diminish your brand. A graceful response isn’t about letting others walk all over you—it’s about walking away with your dignity intact and your brand’s reputation stronger than ever.
Building an Extraordinary Brand Message That Shatters Ceilings
The next time someone tests your confidence—whether it’s a client who questions your rates or a stranger with unsolicited criticism—remember Ariel’s lesson: you can say “F you” with only a smile.
This isn’t about being fake; it’s about understanding the value you bring and standing firm in it. Champagne Clientele—the kind of clients who value exclusivity and quality—are drawn to businesses that radiate calm authority.
So, what’s your next step? Start crafting a brand message that showcases your resilience, sophistication, and generosity. By doing so, you’ll not only attract premium clients—you’ll shatter the glass ceilings that stand between you and uncommon wealth.
Ready to take your brand message from ordinary to extraordinary?
Let’s create something unforgettable together. Take my free brand messaging quiz and see how the right words can open new doors.
